Why me?

A few autumn updates 🍂

I’ve so delighted in biking to school with my kids this autumn. It’s sharp + cold in the mornings, and the stream of bicycles reminds me of Copenhagen. All of the children come zipping and zooming down their driveways, shrieking to their friends, and we ride through the neighborhood before turning onto a leafy, tree-lined path to the schoolyard. I especially love the many exquisite Halloween decorations our corner of the world has embraced—giant spiders, skeletons with skeleton dogs, bubbling cauldrons. It feels like something out of a 90s movie. All you need is Meg Ryan walking down the street in a cozy cardigan hauling a pumpkin. Or Sarah Jessica Parker dancing to “I Put a Spell On You'“.

I also had such a good time at the Southport Literary Fair in Kenosha last weekend. I met some authors who I’ve read + enjoyed, and some authors who I’ve been wanting to meet, and some authors who I had the good fortune of being introduced to. I’ve long wanted to hang out in person with Ali Novak, who wrote My Life With the Walter Boys¹—we share an agent and it turns out we were also at UW at the exact same time and even lived in the same dorm.

Mom jeans and a turtleneck. Just keepin’ the 90s alive.

I don’t go to many author events because I live in a teeny-tiny town with three small children that need a lot of my hours. And when I do, I often feel like a dork—I explained to my mom all fretfully that these were “real authors” and she kindly reminded me that I, too, am a real author. When I walked in, I met the kind owner of the hosting bookstore (Blue House Books) who immediately said, “Nice to meet you! How good are you at being handed last-minute tasks?”² and gave me the job of moderating a panel after someone called in sick. I’ve never, ever done that but found it so delightful! It brought back all of my memories of podcasting; I really do love leading conversations and asking questions and getting my fingernails dirty. And then someone had the audacity to say I looked like Greta Gerwig, so I walked around with my head enlarged about four sizes. Terrific times had, all around.

I’ll be at the Wisconsin Library Association fall conference in Green Bay, WI on November 7, talking about the essential role of hope in middle grade fiction. The full agenda’s here, but I’d love to see ya there.

A note on Eowyn’s namesake:

A lot of people assume that I’m a Tolkien freak when they hear that the main character in Take It From the Top is named Eowyn. The epigraph for The Funeral Ladies of Ellerie County was also a classic Tolkien quote. And I am Catholic, so—some stereotypes ring true.

But I’ve actually only read Lord of the Rings once (I’m halfway through a second read-through and enjoying it so much more than I did the first time). I do like the movies. But I’m not much of an elf-and-quest girl. I appreciate Tolkien’s work for the hefty themes behind it, not necessarily the epicness of the quest. If I never read about another sword battle again until I die, I’d be perfectly content.

Tolkien, however, has so much meaning + richness in his storytelling that I can’t help but obsess over it. And during my recent reading of Fellowship of the Ring, I was so struck by the moment when Frodo realizes the enormity of the task being set before him. He is, after all, such a little hobit, “not made for such perilous quests.” He wonders to Gandalf, who has thus far been a dear companion and guide: “Why did it come to me? Why was I chosen?”

“Such questions can not be answered,” said Gandalf. “You may be sure that it was not for any merit that others do not possess: not for power or wisdom, at any rate. But you have been chosen, and you must therefore use such strength and heart and wits as you have.”

So many of the characters in my works are asking, why me?

Abby³: Why me? Why does my sister have to be sick?

Kate⁴: Why me? Why did I have to be the one going viral?

Anna⁵: Why me? Why have I decided to uncover the truth about Rachel Riley?

Iris⁶: Why me? Why do I have to be in love with someone with PTSD?

And now, Eowyn in Take It From the Top: Why me? Why do I have to be the one whose mom died?

None of these characters (with the exception of perhaps Anna, who can have a semi-grandiose view of herself) see themselves as having any particular skills or wit. They’re just normal people, going about their normal days, being handed these enormously difficult lives to walk through.

But as CS Lewis has said, there’s no such thing as an ordinary person.

None of us are ordinary. We’re all capable of using the strength and heart and wits we do have to achieve remarkable feats. For some, that might mean literally saving a human being’s life, like Kate heroically does. But for Eowyn, that means having the courage to face each day and seek joy in it when your life has been marked with a harrowing grief.

After all, aren’t we all asking that question in some ways? Why me? Why this path? Why this suffering? Why this quest?

But that question, Gandalf reminds us, is not for us to answer. It wasn’t because of our spectacular merits; our bold and brazen abilities. It’s because of our gumption, really. It’s because of our hearts.

If you want to learn more about Eowyn’s story, you know what I’m about to say: preorder the book! Preorders help midlist authors like me so very much, and I would be forever grateful if you added Take It From the Top to your home library or gifted it to a middle grader. (Or not your home library! Ask your library to order a copy if you can’t afford one—I totally get it! Our shelves are only so big + our wallets only so deep.) Take it From the Top releases 11/19 from HarperCollins.

And lastly, a book (or two) I’ve loved lately for…

Kids: Fall is the best time to curl up with my littles (ages 8, 6, and 3), warm cups of tea, and a giant stack of books. Their choice would be Hallo-Wiener by Dan Pilkey, which is just as ridiculous as you’d expect but hey, they love it. I’ve been really focused on getting poetry into their ears lately and we enjoyed the poetry collection The Proper Way to Meet a Hedgehog and Other How-To Poems. Lastly, Angelina’s Halloween by Katharine Holabird has been a huge hit—my kids are all suckers for that sweet little mouse, and the illustrations by Helen Craig are some of my all-time favorites.

Middle graders: I’ve become such a Gennifer Choldenko fan, and I loved Chasing Secrets. This is the story of 13-year-old Lizzie, a girl living in the Gilded Age in San Francisco who’s determined to find out if the plague is hitting her beloved city. She joins forces with Noah, a cook’s son in Chinatown, and they try and put the pieces together of what’s happening in San Francisco and why everyone’s lying to them about it. It’s fast-paced, it’s character-driven, and it’s meaningful without being preachy.

Adults: Like I said, I’m re-reading Lord of the Rings and that’s taken 99% of my reading time, but I’m also diving into Somewhere in France by Jennifer Robson. Major Downton Abbey vibes.

Thanks for reading along!

-Claire-

1. Which was the number one show on Netflix last year! #famousfriends

2. I’m not exaggerating.

3. What Happens Next

4. The Kate In Between

5. What Happened to Rachel Riley

6. The Funeral Ladies of Ellerie County